Even though I had already written a more wonderful post than this, I'm going to write this one now, because THAT ONE'S GONE. But I'm going to write again because I'm upset, and sad. And it's by far easiest to write when you're sad and upset. However, the result is not always amazing. But it gets written, anyways.
Today was another "I'm so exhausted I burst into tears at the slightest provocation" kind of day. It was also a Thursday, which is always kind of stressful, and I had a screaming headache, and I had to sing in chapel. So the day was kind of difficult, and then, of course, socially, I simply fought with EVERYONE today.
Today my mom called me an insensitive, self-centered b*tch, and I believe her. Which, of course, makes me self-centered and insensitive. I just feel like everyone hates me today, which shouldn't really affect me since I kind of hate them, too. But I keep getting yelled at.
And this stupid student log in tech thing. Of course all the help sources our teacher gave us are out of town, and of course she doesn't answer my email to her. I'm going to get another reminder card for this, which'll put me at two, and all of them in tech. I got screamed at for 20 minutes straight, and I'm still going to get a reminder card. FABULOUS.
Oh, and the milk was sour. And I drank half a glass of it in my tea.
The problem with having amazing role models (Darren Criss, Lindsay Carpenter, Emma Watson, etc.) is that you will never achieve as much in your life as they did, and will constantly be in a state of comparison. I have the sinking feeling that I will never accomplish much of anything in my life, and leave the world without having made a difference at all, quick to be forgotten, never having made myself or anyone else happy. I'm afraid I'll never meet these role models, never do the things I've set my hopes on, and live a dull, uninteresting life and then die.
What a day. I feel like punching a baby.
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1 comment:
Wow thats sucks. Trust me your the least self-centered person I'v ever meet. Sorry about another bad day, two in a row is makes you feel down. But i know how you feel when you day at the slightest thing you want to break down. Ay chapel though you sang well, the beginning was a bit shaky and the end you switched notes kinda fast but it was pretty good. Tech is stupid at its a waste that you got a reminder card for that. I het milk being sour it seems every milk cartoon my mom buys smells weird, I think i grew a milk smelling ability. Don't worry about not accomplishing anything you will. But its crazy i feel exactly thats same way a lot. Hopefully Friday will be better.
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